The Practice of Self Control: Ki and Education
In Buddhism, there is the idea called “in-en-ka (cause-ties-result)”. Things have a result not only due to a cause, but it is necessary to have ties as well. The role of education is what we call “ties”.
Even if a person has very fine personal qualities, if his education is not good, he cannot grow. Just as with cultivating crops, you cannot get fruit just by sowing seed. Before you sow the seed, you need to cultivate the field. Then, you need water and fertilizer, and you must take care of the crops everyday. All this is required to get good fruit.
Education is necessary to live as a human being. Many people think, “I have never been an educator”. However, in reality, most of the people provide some form of education to others. If you are a father or mother, you educate your children. If you are an executive or manager, you educate your employees.
Education means to show the way and then allow others to grow on their own. If you expect to mold others exactly as you want, this is not education but enforcement. Many people confuse “education” and “enforcement”.
Also, some people want to get fruit just after sowing the seed. This is ignoring nature. You need patience to wait for growth and development to occur.
Anyone feel stress when things do not go in the way they would like. At your work place, if your employee does not improve no matter how you helped him to grow and develop, you might want to get angry, “Why should I repeat the same things again and again to you!”.
However, it is impossible to educate people if you have a short temper or emotionally impatient. When you explode at someone, you may thing those words are for the other person. However, in truth, you did it to satisfy yourself.
When you are an educator you must have patience.
When you need to speak to someone, before speaking, first calm your mind and then say the words which others need, not what you want to say.
It seems very easy. However, it is difficult to do it anytime, with anyone, any place. You need to train.
To control yourself, you must train to keep your breath calm.
When your breath is rough? When you are nervous, anxious, angry, which causes you to loose your mental stability. This state of your mind shows up as rough breath.
By doing Ki breathing everyday, you can master calm breathing. When you do Ki breathing, your breath is calm. But your breath is not only calm during Ki breathing but also becomes calm in your daily life. Your mind will not be disturbed by small things.
By doing this, you will be able to have a breadth of mind to accept others and wait for other’s growth. Therefore there is no stress.
The reason why I can say this is that I had made this kind of mistake many times. I used to have a bad temper and it was easy for me to be emotional. Everyone who knows me now says, “I can’t believe it!”. My family and old staff know my personality well.
By training self-control through Ki breathing, I have been able to wait for other’s development with plus mind. There is no stress, therefore, my body remains very comfortable. This is one of the greatest realizations in my learning.
At Ki forum 2006, I will teach Ki breathing as the way of self-control in the afternoon seminar. Please join us!